My usual caveat: unless I’m reasonably sure of the origin of some of the tales I relate I’ll try to make sure not to bless them with authenticity. That said, some of the stories are just too good not to memorialize and in most cases, even if they didn’t really happen, they should have. The following is purported to originate with my old friend from Chicago, Vince Volpe. He was working an inbound rush at PAPPI (Northeast arrival fix to ORD), which was populated with several overseas arrivals from Europe. All of the other identities are distorted to protect the innocent.

UA405: Chicago Center, United Four-oh-five, Flight Level Two Four Zero.
VV: United Four-oh-five, Chicago, descend and maintain 11,000, Chicago altimeter 3005.
UA405: Roger, 11,000, 30-oh-5.
AL23: Chee-cahgo Center, Al-ah-talia Two Tree, Flighta Level Two-a Four Ceero.
VV: Al-ah-talia Two Tree, descenda to aleven tousand, da altimeter, tree, ceero, ceero, fibe-ah.
AL23: Roger, Al-ah-talia, tree, ceero, ceero, fibe-ah.
AA193: Chicago Center, American One-ninety-three, out of twenty-six for twenty four.
VV: American One-ninety-three, Chicago, descend and maintain 11,000, Chicago altimeter 3005.
AA193: 11,000, 3-0-0-5 for 193
PA3: Chicago, Clipper Three, Two-four-oh.
VV: Clipper Three, Chicago, descend and maintain 11,000, Chicago altimeter 3005.
PA3: Clipper Three, roger, eleven thousand.
BA129: Chicago, Speedbird 129, Flight Level two four zero.
VV: Speedbird 129, Chicago, descend and maintain 11,000, Chicago altimeter 3005.
BA129: Twenty Four for 11, Speedbird.
AL23: Hey, Chee-cahgo, you make-a funna da way we talk?
VV: Naw, I make-a funna da uddah guys.




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